Recently I've been sounding a lot like a two-year-old. I don't have one of those yet, but I know how they act and what they sound like.
As a full-time mom, it is hard for me to also be a part-time nurse. I work part-time at a local hospital usually 2-3 times a week. It is so hard for me to leave my family and go to work!
I've never been a huge fan of going to work. I know I sound lazy, but I'm really not. I have so much I would like to do at home that I hate going to work.
The #1 reason I don't like going to work is leaving my baby girl. I miss her so much while I'm at work. When she was just a newborn, I would get all choked up and cry just in anticipation of leaving to go to work. Now that she's a little older, it's not quite as tough, but it still is hard for me to leave her at home and not take her with me.
It's hard because I work in the evenings and during the night so when I go to work, I miss being able to put my baby girl to bed. I love that time of day!
I love nursing her before bed, then reading books, then rocking, then cuddling while I hold her.
I love feeling her warm dreamy breath on my cheek, I love looking at her droopy eyelids.
I love putting her in her crib and watching her roll over onto her side or tummy and give that one last huge yawn before she's asleep.
And I miss that when I'm at work.
What motivates you to go to work? I mean I know that earning money is important, but I wish I could freeze time while I'm away so that I wouldn't have to miss out on these precious moments!
August 19, 2011
August 18, 2011
Mermaid Giveaway
You can win an incredible Mermaid Tail from this website.
Head on over to enter the giveaway!
August 16, 2011
Another Baby
We have a daughter who is less than one year old. And I am constantly thinking about when we will get pregnant again! We have struggled with infertility for years. It took a lot of time and money to get pregnant with our daughter.
Once we finally got pregnant, I felt relieved that I didn't have to deal with infertility again for a while. But the thought still loomed in my head. We had a magical pregnancy and delivery, but as soon as our baby girl arrived, I started thinking about our next baby.
When would we get pregnant again? Would we be able to get pregnant naturally this time? Or would we embark yet again on a several-year journey of medications, ovulation testing, procedures, ultrasounds, waiting, more waiting, hoping to get pregnant?
I can't help thinking sometimes that my infertility has been "cured". It's easy to think that because we have one baby having another one will be a piece of cake. At least that's what I'm hoping for.
We are not under so much stress and pressure to have another baby right away this time. For years the only thought that occupied my mind was "I want to get pregnant now!". I am more content and happy now that we have our baby girl. But I still wonder when the next time is that we will get pregnant.
Will it be in a month? 6 months? 1 year? 3 years? I KNOW that we will get pregnant again and have more children. That's a fact. But the not knowing WHEN is so hard!
We had discussed birth control when my daughter was born and made the decision to not take any kind of birth control. We truly felt like if we got pregnant right away (even though it's not advised or good for a postpartum body such as mine) we would be thrilled.
And I truly would be thrilled! Now that our baby is older and not really a newborn, getting pregnant would be so great! I always wanted my kids to be close in age. Maybe not 9 months close, but within a couple years of each other.
Some days I try not to think about it much, since stress is not good for a woman who wants to get pregnant. But I can't help thinking about it.
Whenever it does happen, my world will transform again in to a magical land of pregnancy hormones and dreams of a larger family. I love being pregnant.
Once we finally got pregnant, I felt relieved that I didn't have to deal with infertility again for a while. But the thought still loomed in my head. We had a magical pregnancy and delivery, but as soon as our baby girl arrived, I started thinking about our next baby.
When would we get pregnant again? Would we be able to get pregnant naturally this time? Or would we embark yet again on a several-year journey of medications, ovulation testing, procedures, ultrasounds, waiting, more waiting, hoping to get pregnant?
I can't help thinking sometimes that my infertility has been "cured". It's easy to think that because we have one baby having another one will be a piece of cake. At least that's what I'm hoping for.
We are not under so much stress and pressure to have another baby right away this time. For years the only thought that occupied my mind was "I want to get pregnant now!". I am more content and happy now that we have our baby girl. But I still wonder when the next time is that we will get pregnant.
Will it be in a month? 6 months? 1 year? 3 years? I KNOW that we will get pregnant again and have more children. That's a fact. But the not knowing WHEN is so hard!
We had discussed birth control when my daughter was born and made the decision to not take any kind of birth control. We truly felt like if we got pregnant right away (even though it's not advised or good for a postpartum body such as mine) we would be thrilled.
And I truly would be thrilled! Now that our baby is older and not really a newborn, getting pregnant would be so great! I always wanted my kids to be close in age. Maybe not 9 months close, but within a couple years of each other.
Some days I try not to think about it much, since stress is not good for a woman who wants to get pregnant. But I can't help thinking about it.
Whenever it does happen, my world will transform again in to a magical land of pregnancy hormones and dreams of a larger family. I love being pregnant.
August 15, 2011
Clutter
I am talking about clutter.
The endless stacks of paper and mail on my kitchen table. The cereal boxes and leftover cookies on the counter. The clothes on the floor. The random hair accessories in the bathroom drawers. The overfilled closets. Wrapping paper and bows.
Clutter is everywhere! It's been taking over my house slowly for the past couple of years. But I hate it!
It gets in the way. It looks horrible! When I "clean" for guests, everything unsightly gets put in our extra storage room, and then I lock and bolt the door so no one can see what our house really looks like.
I spend waaaaaay too long looking for important documents, or the measuring tape that I can't find for the life of me.
I'm telling you, clutter in the home can seriously interfere with happy living!
But today is a new day. I've been reading a book on how to de-clutter and it's given me some great ideas. I've always wanted that immaculate looking house, where everything has it's place and there's a place for everything.
As a perfectionist though, I become OVERWHELMED just thinking about de-cluttering.
This is my normal thought process,
"I want to organize my room and bathroom. So I'll start by cleaning off the top of the dresser. Boy, when did I accumulate so many hair accessories and pieces of jewelry? I guess I'll make a place in the bathroom for all this stuff so I can clear off the top of the dresser. But all the bathroom drawers are cluttered and full of random brushes, combs, floss, curling irons, hair products, what do I do with those? If I clean out the bathroom drawers, then I'll have room to put my jewelry and hair accessories in there. But where will I put the random curling irons? I could put them in a box downstairs! But wait, before I put them downstairs, I have to organize the shelves in the basement by color, size, item, season. In order to do that, I have to buy more storage boxes and go through all the seasonal stuff. Where should I store that extra Christmas tree we have down there? Now that I'm thinking of it, I should go through all the Christmas ornaments one by one and get rid of all the cracked ones........."See? My thought process makes me so overwhelmed that I keep pushing off this project. I am going to set goals and tell myself that each day I need to set aside some time, whether it is a chunk of time (1-2 hours) or 10 minute increments (the latter is more realistic for me since I have a baby).
I WILL DE-CLUTTER MY HOME SO THAT I CAN HAVE A HAPPY LIVING SPACE!
August 11, 2011
Laughing at Infertility (Part 2)
I found this website which brought great relief to my situation. However, I feel like I missed out during my years of inferitlity, because it wasn't until after I got pregnant and delivered my daughter that I stumbled upon this website.
There are others out there just like this one, but it helped me to realize that there are hundreds, no, thousands, of other women and couples out there who are struggling just like I did to get pregnant. Struggling with the same emotions and questions that I struggled with on a daily basis.
All those years I thought I was the only one out there. I didn't want to talk about it to anyone. I didn't want to laugh, to smile, to be happy. I thought, "Poor little me, no one else could be hurting as much as I am."
I was pretty self-absorbed. But the other night I spent a while reading through several reasons why to laugh at infertility. I LOVE these "Birds and Bees" videos on YouTube:
Jane's Pregnant
I had a window
They must not be working
On a different note, I just found this video of the song "I Would Die For That" sung by Kellie Coffey that made me cry!
Seriously though, take a moment to laugh at your situation. It's the only way to get through life. I wish I had learned this lesson years ago, it would have helped a lot during those long sleepless nights.
There are others out there just like this one, but it helped me to realize that there are hundreds, no, thousands, of other women and couples out there who are struggling just like I did to get pregnant. Struggling with the same emotions and questions that I struggled with on a daily basis.
All those years I thought I was the only one out there. I didn't want to talk about it to anyone. I didn't want to laugh, to smile, to be happy. I thought, "Poor little me, no one else could be hurting as much as I am."
I was pretty self-absorbed. But the other night I spent a while reading through several reasons why to laugh at infertility. I LOVE these "Birds and Bees" videos on YouTube:
Jane's Pregnant
I had a window
They must not be working
On a different note, I just found this video of the song "I Would Die For That" sung by Kellie Coffey that made me cry!
Seriously though, take a moment to laugh at your situation. It's the only way to get through life. I wish I had learned this lesson years ago, it would have helped a lot during those long sleepless nights.
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